Luckily (or maybe unluckily) for bartenders everywhere, karaoke and alcohol go together like gin and juice. And if a good bartender is defined by being able to help someone find a drink they’re going to love, maybe we’re also pretty good at helping people figure out what they’re in the mood for after they’ve thrown a few back. Here are five of our karaoke pairings for each kind of drunk you might get tonight:
Are You Cry-About-Your-Break-Up Drunk?
Alanis Morissette wrote the book on how to tell your asshole ex to go screw himself, and the title of that book is “You Oughta Know.” Have a few wines and scream out all your rage. Note: this song is best performed while staring into the eyes of your ex and his new girlfriend.
Are You a Sexy Drunk?
Ginuwine’s “Pony” is not only one of the steamiest songs ever written, but you’re going to love all the built-in bronco-riding dance moves. We just hope your hips are limber enough for the job.
Are You a Confident Drunk?
It seems like everytime someone wants to show off their voice they pick a some dull ballad that puts the whole room to sleep. If you want to flex your talents and keep it light, skip the Whitney Houston and pick literally anything by Madonna. Of course, if you nail “Like A Prayer,” you’ll be a karaoke legend.
Are you an “I Love You, Man” Drunk?
Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton’s “Islands in the Stream” is one of the best love songs ever written, made even better because it can be about any kind of love. If you’re with your spouse, your best friend, your sister, or anyone who’s stuck with you for better or for worse, this is the best song to grin like idiots at each other.
Are You an Obnoxious Drunk?
Everyone knows every word of this and physically cannot resist singing along. And best of all, even if your voice can sound like a someone’s shaking a bag of gravel and it won’t matter. In fact, it might help. You and all your obnoxious pals can belt this one out together and take over the room.
Got a better song? Prove it! Come down to Attic Alehouse on a Friday after 10pm for some of the rowdiest karaoke in Seattle. We’ve got the best hostess in town, and a room full of voices that belong everywhere from America’s Got Talent to America’s Funniest Home Videos. Want to come throw down with the best, or sing along with the rest? Come to Attic Alehouse!